Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Thank you, revisited

Thank you all so much for your comments on my last post!  We are cautiously optimistic now about the outcome of our cycle.  Unfortunately, having had a past chemical pregnancy myself and spending way too much time reading blogs in this community over the past three years make me acutely aware of all the things that could still go wrong.  But for today, I am pregnant, and that is a wonderful thing.


You may recall my posting about our intention to give our donor a nice bouquet of flowers the day of egg retrieval, along with a card containing the message I posted here.  We carried out our plan, and although I didn't get to see the flowers--they hadn't arrived yet by the time we left St. Mungo's on retrieval day--I was content with our gesture and glad I'd made the effort.  (After initially thinking we should do nothing, MM then thought the flowers and card were not enough and that we should have bought her something nicer.  Go figure.)

About a week later, I had an email from our nurse to let me know that she had seen the donor for a follow-up appointment (she is doing well, by the way) and that she was "blown away" by our flowers and actually sent us a thank you card for them!  St. Mungo's forwarded her card on to us, and here's what it says:

MM & S--

Thank you so much for the thoughtful card and the beautiful flowers.  I have no doubt that you will both make amazing parents.  I wish you the very best and hope with all my being that your dream of a family comes true.  I feel honored that you chose me as a donor and allowed me to help you make your dream come true.

All the best,

The card itself has a picture of a baby elephant nestled up against the leg of a much larger elephant (probably its mother).  It is very cute, and it's from Tra.der Joe's, which is one of my favorite stores.  (Glad to know she shops there, too.)

I've posted before about how much it meant to hear the nurse and the third-party coordinator's personal impressions of our donor.  Although the information provided by St. Mungo's in its donor profiles is as comprehensive as any recipient could hope to see without actually knowing the donor, there are so many intangibles about a person that cannot easily be captured in a written profile or in photographs.  I would use the analogy of online dating.  It's one thing to read someone's profile, view their pictures and think that you're well-suited; it may be another thing entirely when you actually meet face-to-face.  Been there, done that.

So knowing that our donor is the type of person who would take the time to send us a thank you card--after the irreplaceable gift she has given us!--and being able to read her words in her own handwriting means a lot.  I will be putting this card away for safekeeping in case our future child wants to see it someday.


  1. What a nice gesture, on both your parts. So glad you are pregnant!!! YAY!
    I know, I am 'cautiously optimistic' too, but it's a great feeling nonetheless.
    I remember back in the day reading Egg Donor signs on trains thinking about doing it... it seems funny now that I didn't want to do all of that hormone therapy. Ha. Well, I clink a glass of sparkling cider to you! Cheers!

  2. Don't ya just love the "thank you for the thank you" sentiments.

  3. What a nice gesture from you AND from her!

    I am so happy for you. You are incredibly deserving of this, and I am keeping everything firmly crossed for wonderful beta numbers.

  4. This post is so sweet. Your blog is one of the few that I've followed for a long time that has never shown a hint of real hope in your journey or any indication that you might get your wish. This makes me so incredibly happy for you, and I'll be reading often to see what's going on and hoping for the absolute best for you and MM.

  5. Wow, how sweet of your donor. So glad you are feeling so confident in your decision...she sounds like a lovely person.

  6. Sounds like you picked a very thoughtful donor. I'm hoping and praying that this cycle works out for you and you get your baby elephant! (so to speak)

  7. i understand cautiously optimistic - but it is a different ball game you are playing now.

    sounds like you picked the right person as your donor - someone "like" you!


  8. Wow...sooo nice of your donor to do that for you! And oh believe me...it took me until like week 16 to really believe I was pg. So don't worry if you feel you should be "ecstatic" about the BFP. Of course you are but chemical pg's, losses, etc. takes all the fun out of BFPs. So far, so good!

  9. Figured out how to at least comment from home- What a lovely note form your donor. Kinds gives me the warm fuzzies and reminds me there are good kind strangers still roaming about.

    P.S, I love trader joes too!

  10. That was very thoughtful of your donor. I am glad it gave you and added layer of comfort with the process. I understand your worry about a chemical, are your POAS every day now, or are you waiting it out for your beta?


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