Friday, June 24, 2011

Irrational

I woke up at 2:30 this morning to use the bathroom (rare occurrence) and tossed and turned until 5:30 (also rare).  When I got up at 5:30, I did two HPTs--one digital, one FRER--with the pee I'd saved from 2:30.  (I know, EEEWWW!)  Both tests were very obviously positive.

I was at the lab a little after it opened at 7 to have my blood drawn for my beta hCG and progesterone tests.  (On a side note, there is certainly an interesting assortment of people at the lab first thing in the morning.)  I waited less than half an hour, had a nearly-painless stick, and was at my office by 8.

As I sit here beginning my work day, despite seeing two more BFPs this morning, I am disproportionately worried about today's beta.  I don't think this is rational, as I have no reason to believe that I will get anything but good news later today.  I don't feel any different this morning than I did yesterday, so I have no reason to think that anything has gone wrong.  Yet the feeling persists.

For the first time this week, I feel like I can kind-of relate to MM's feelings of anxiety about how this will turn out.  Maybe, in a perverse way, that's a good thing.

If past experience with St. Mungo's is any indicator of when I can expect a call with my results, then I doubt I will hear anything until the end of the day.  I will, of course, post my numbers when I have them.

Until then, if you could spare some positive energy, thoughts or prayers for me, I'd appreciate them.

7 comments:

  1. Sending positive energy your way!

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  2. Lots of positive thoughts headed your way from my end. I can't wait to hear the results!

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  3. prayers and positive thoughts! It is SO going to be a beautiful, beautiful number! Hope your day goes by at lightning speed!

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  4. Sending gobs of postive energy and prayers your way!!!

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  5. I know the negative thoughts creep in pretty easily, BELIEVE ME, but try to hang in there!

    Sending all kinds of good thoughts - Can't wait to hear your fabulous numbers!

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  6. *~*~*~* POSITIVE VIBES ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    There.

    Good luck! I know you'll get a good beta.

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  7. I don't know why this came to me while reading this blog, but I suddenly had a couple lines from the movie, Rudy, go through my mind. The Notre Dame football team is in the dressing room getting ready to go on the field, when they all gather round. The coach yells out Our Lady of Victory, and the team responds "Pray for us!".

    Strange that your post would bring that up.

    I will be holding onto good thoughts for you!

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