Void

My head has been full of a lot of thoughts this past week, none of which seem really fit to share here.  Have given some serious contemplation to shutting down this blog.  Maybe a long-ish hiatus would be more in order, as my feelings may change at some time, and I do think that this blog is a good source of information for anyone contemplating DE IVF.

Good things are happening in my life, too.  I had my annual review at work yesterday, and it didn't go as badly as I'd feared.  We took a quick trip to Las Vegas last weekend to see my sister and her family while they were visiting there for a week.  That was fun, as I had not seen them in a year, and my sister had not seen the boys since they were only weeks old.  I am blessed with terrific friends and family who have supported me through some difficult times.

If I step away from this space, it will be here when I return.

It's over

I'm no longer pregnant.  We will never meet this little one.

Lots of mixed emotions, and, sorry to admit, a teeny bit of relief that I woke up with no nausea today for the first time in over a week.  Still feeling pretty fatigued and crampy.

I'm not sure that I'd ever reached a point of truly believing this would happen, but I feel especially bad for MM, who was happy and excited.  He'd been picking out names and shopping online for mini-vans (a vehicle he'd previously vehemently opposed but decided we'd have to get for three car seats).

Don't really have much more to say about it but wanted to let you know.