I'm not much of a worrier by nature. Sure, like anyone, I worry about some things from time to time. But by and large, I don't have a lot of anxiety or spend a lot of time dwelling on "what if"s. It's just not my personality.
MM, on the other hand, is an inveterate worrier. So as you can imagine, his worrying has been in overdrive since we found out I am pregnant. I've tried to tell him that there will always be something to worry about, even once these babies are (we hope) born and healthy. He still worries about every little thing.
In addition to the usual pregnancy-related nausea and exhaustion, I have been sick with a head cold for the past few days. (If nothing else, it's been a good reminder that even though I thought I couldn't possibly feel worse, I could and do.) I woke up yesterday with some unaccustomed pain in my lower abdomen and right flank and ended up going to the OB to get checked out.
The OB took a quick look at the babies on ultrasound and examined me. She sent my urine for culture but basically concluded that I'd probably strained some muscles from coughing and sleeping in a strange bed over the weekend (we were out of town for a friend's wedding). I ended up taking the rest of the day off work to rest and recuperate.
Last night, I slept a little better but had a really negative dream about this pregnancy. I dreamed that when I went for my NT scan (which is scheduled for this coming Monday), both the babies hearts had stopped beating. I don't know what put this thought into my subconscious mind, particularly when I'd just been at the doctor earlier in the day and seen them, beating hearts and all. I certainly have no rational reason to believe that anything is going to go wrong.
I suppose a lot of pregnant women have similar dreams or concerns, and I'd guess for women who've gone through infertility, the percentage is even higher. I guess a bit more anxiety than my norm, even if it only creeps out when I'm sleeping, is to be expected.
What do you think?