Monday, July 13, 2009

Hodge-podge

Isn't it funny how, once you know your body and your cycles, you can't turn that knowledge off, even during break cycles? Although MM and I are taking a break this cycle and at this point I believe that we have a snowball's chance in hell of conceiving on our own (hey, I'm no physician, so that's an unscientific estimate of the odds), I was briefly excited this afternoon when I visited the ladies' room and noted the presence of egg-white cervical mucus ("EWCM").

Today is CD 11 for me (no, I didn't have to think about that either; I just knew), so it is about when I expect to see EWCM. Not that having EWCM at the right point in my cycles or having sex during my "fertile window" has done me any good thus far.

It's funny how I seem to take a hiatus from this blog when we're taking a break. I suppose it's because I am less focused on TTC during those cycles (though it is never completely out of my mind), and there is simply less to share.

I will share that a high school friend of mine who was visiting the past couple of weeks asked if MM and I will adopt if/when it becomes clear that we will not be able to conceive a child of our own. I explained to her that neither of us is keen on the idea, for the reasons I wrote about here. She expressed the feeling that it would be "a shame" if MM and I were never parents because we'd be good ones and "there are so many children out there who need homes."

I don't dispute the truth of her statement about children needing homes, but the fact of the matter is, even if we DID adopt, MM and I would likely not be adopting one of those children to whom my friend is referring. When my friend talks about children needing homes, I don't think she is making reference to children for whom there is a months-long waiting list with most adoption agencies: healthy Caucasian newborns. She probably means older kids in foster care, kids with special needs or health problems, kids who are hard(er) to place.

To be fair, my friend brought the topic up in a very non-offensive way and has been very supportive about our struggles. She hopes to adopt herself one day. (Long story short, she met a man who'd had a vasectomy when she was 19, married him when she was 21, and divorced him when she was 38. As a result, she is now 40, childless and single and doubts she will have a biological child herself.)

Our dog drama has subsided. Among other things, we had a dog trainer/behaviorist out to our house on Friday afternoon and have begun following some of his suggestions (and plan to follow others). The small changes we have made have already made a big difference with the dogs; the tension between them is 99% less than it had been, and there have been no further fights. We are optimistic that, with management and some work on our part, the dogs can peacefully co-exist in our home.

The bruise on my right arm is nearly gone, but I am still having pain and have some deeper lumps/bumps under the surface of my skin. I am continuing to take ibuprofen and monitoring my arm. I may have to eventually go back to the doctor if it does not improve on its own.

All my work commitments for this week but one (today's) went away at the eleventh hour. The trial which was supposed to start tomorrow settled at 4:45 on Friday afternoon, and the mediation for Thursday will now be covered by the partner, since he won't be in trial. So as it turns out, I would've been fine timing-wise this cycle, but oh well. I didn't know it until it was too late, and I wouldn't have wanted to start a cycle using expensive meds when I didn't know if I could be appropriately monitored or follow through with the IUI.

Who knows? Maybe MM and I will be one of those "urban legend" couples who get pregnant on a break cycle. LOL

4 comments:

  1. some one has to be the story behind the legend :) praying that it is you!

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  2. i'm so glad to hear the dog situation is getting better. good luck this month!

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  3. I'm so glad things are working out better with the dogs! I was never aware of cycle days or anything like that before IF. It definitely changes the way I mark the month passing by. :)

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  4. My last cycle we started a "break" but you're right -- once you know those signs it's like they just won't get out of your head, eh? It wasn't to be, for me, but here's hoping the "just stop trying! then you'll get pregnant" works for you! (I am here for ICLW, so I'm a new reader.)

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